Behavior You Don't Want to Show on Social Networks

Isra Garcia
Isra Garcia Digital transformation advisor and new media analyst, IG

Posted on March 28th 2014

Behavior You Don't Want to Show on Social Networks

I’m completely fascinated by observing and analysing the behaviours that one can glimpse in social platforms and by the way in which people relate to one another.

How you connect, why you connect or why you decide not to. What it takes to step forward and connect with someone. How your perception changes in regard to someone you’ve never spoken to but who mentions you on Twitter one day. The empathy that arises with someone who suddenly shares an event with you. How much you can have in common with someone who’s seen suggested to you on Facebook or LinkedIn time and time again and whom you’ve never contacted until they contact you. Or the interesting, rewarding blog you discover one day when the person running it mentions your blog.

Behaviour you read between the lines

In the same way there is an unwritten contract in the social web, there are certainly unwritten and unspoken behaviours too. We don’t talk about them because it’s not in our best interest to point them out. However, that doesn’t mean they don’t exist:

  • Speaking greatly of great work carried out by others isn’t a sin (even if you don’t follow them or if they don’t follow you, you won’t be going to hell for it!)
  • Following someone, reading what they say, supporting them, sharing their projects, articles or videos, recommending them to possible clients isn’t a felony (even if this person doesn’t follow you, doesn’t always get back to you or doesn’t hang on your every word!).
  • Saying that someone you share your profession with (what someone might call “your competition”) is simply brilliant and counting on them for a project, a conference, a blogpost or a client won’t make you less respected, believable or influential. Quite the opposite!
  • Reading, sharing, following, mentioning, praising someone for sharing a programme, course, conference, tweet or anything of the kind, doesn’t really say anything interesting about you and doesn’t really add value to the other person or yourself. There is no real connection!.

People usually say that the social web is socialising but are we really sure about this? We become more select, twisted, Machiavellian, sarcastic, even cynical and intolerant. The only thing that’s changed, really, is that we can add a smiley at the end of every sentence, “J”, and then everything seems to make sense.

Let’s start by being ourselves, being honest, clear and direct. There’s nothing wrong with ending a sentence with a full stop; quite the opposite, it should be the most common and coherent way to do so. I find it really hard to believe you can get along with everyone or that you can refer to everyone as your “sweetie” or “dear”. It’s like you want to be at every party, be accepted by any circle of Tweeps or be chosen as a panel member at every social organisation conference.

I don’t think I’m a pessimistic type of guy, tedious or a cretin. However, I’m also aware I’m not interested in being worshipped or revered in the comments to my blog or in every tweet I get as feedback after a conference or in reaction to one of my own tweets. Whoever you are in your real life, so should you be in the digital world; otherwise, something’s not quite right!

  • The ways we connect are changing, we have new tools and trends. However, our values and personality shouldn’t be altered by such changes in our environment.
  • Answer back when you feel the need, not out of obligation.
  • Speak when you have something relevant to say, not because you’re supposed to say something.
  • If you need to be forceful with someone, you’re entitled to be so, but be prepared for an equally forceful comeback.
  • Empower the small people who do great things, not self-centred celebrities.

The key lies in our reaction to social (unfortunately, not human) stimulus.

I’m increasingly certain that we react to the “social” stimuli provided by the social networks. And I believe that “react” is the right word. The opposite of this would be to take initiative, to find something valuable (something that will normally happen right in front of us), pay attention to it, value it objectively and offer the acknowledgement that that person, product or project deserves.

If we limited our interest, anxiety, ego and arrogance to things that make a difference, we wouldn’t have to worry about what will happen if we act sincerely and with dignity!

Photo credit: Robin Huton.

Isra Garcia

Isra Garcia

Digital transformation advisor and new media analyst, IG

Marketer, digital transformation and new media advisor, speaker, blogger, educator and an agent of change.

Social Media Today's Best thinker member. Isra is the creator and author of the paradigm that has revolutionised the social media: Human Media and also founder of Stand OUT Program, Engage Worldwide and Principal at IG.

His blog on Social Media, Marketing, disruption, lifestyle, new perspectives, productivity and change is visited by more than 110,000 people every month. Only 31, Isra has taken part as a TEDx speaker on three occasions and has participated in more than 290 industry events as speaker. At 27, he started his own agency, and has worked as consultant and analyst on new forms of online communication and marketing for other agencies and brands such as EMI Music (Spain – Portugal), BlackBerry (UK – Ireland), MTV (UK), Pioneer (UK) and blur Group (UK – USA), Amnesia Ibiza (Spain) and Music On (Spain – Italy). He has been the promoter of MONK (UK – Italy – Sao Paulo), the first Human Media Marketing agency, where he worked as Human Media Evangelist and Advisor, and is now involved as head of digital media at Bridges for Music (South Africa – India – Brazil), an international NGO that fosters and encourages change and talent. Isra has also been in charge of Marco Carola’s personal brand as one of the most influential artists in the electronic music scene worldwide. He actually advises Ushuaia Beach Hotel, named as number one most technological-adavanced hotel in the world.

His fast-moving career has always been related to Web 2.0.  Isra´s early work as a consultant, in charge of teams and Social Media strategies for Social Media & Community. These are just a few of the highlights of his career. Undoubtedly, Isra adds a visionary and human-technological way to understand this new environment that the Internet has provoked.

Leaving aside companies, roles and projects, Isra has always been characterized by a thrilling passion for the human side of communication.

Isra writes for international publications such as Social Media Today, SmartBrief and contributed with FastCompany and is a guest lecturer at EOI, Fundesem Business School, Nottingham Business School, University of Leeds and University of Manchester. He is co-founder and organiser of Adictos Social Media and "Internet Changes Everything."

Isra is a 31-year-old visionary and pioneer who has revolutionized the New Media environment with his concept of Human Media based on human business interactions through the Social Web . Isra pioneered how the the new use of online media leverages the Social Web through human relationships, Human Business Interactions, connectivity, feelings, resonance and of course people. Specialized studies in Spain, UK and USA represent the base for his international career. Isra was recently on TEDx where he introduced his vision about Human Media and its impact on brands, businesses, people and the Web.

In only two and-a-half years, Isra has completed two Ironman races and, since last september, he is one of the only 89 athletes in the world that has completed the three-day ultra endurance event, "Ultraman" (10k swim + 420k bike + 84,3k run). He always pushes the intellectual and physical work far beyond his limits.

You can find Isra at TEDx events, presenting his perspective on Human Media, the future of social media, change, revolution, Ultraman and disruption. Also, in his Spanish blog http://isragarcia.es and international site http://isragarcia.com.

“Writing about oneself is infinitely more difficult than writing about anyone else. You’ll find that the story you thought you were telling people isn’t the story that people perceived.” Isra García.

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Comments

emarketing .
Posted on March 28th 2014 at 2:45PM

Social media is a platform where you need to popularize other to get the benefits for yourself. Appreciation to others, recommending others and sharing their references will help you to boost up your profile. You can expect the same from others.

Think social media as a fun place rather than business promotion. Business will come to you automatically. Initially it can be tough but slowly its just like icing a cake.

http://www.gmrwebteam.com/