Is Social Media Making Us Less Social?

Stephen Dale Managing Director, Collabor8now Ltd

Posted on December 22nd 2012

Is Social Media Making Us Less Social?


Is Social Media Making Us Less Social? We are increasingly being flooded – bombarded even – by news and information from an ever-increasing number of social media channels. Increasingly, news is coming to us through our friend and interest networks, via Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, and LinkedIn especially. Our cognitive powers in making sense of it, finding the signal within the noise, have never been more challenged.

Some people talk of information anywhere, anytime, but in fact, isn’t it more a case of information everywhere all the time? You can’t get away from it.

There was an article in the press recently querying:  “Are you an “Infomaniac”?

According to the article:

  • 34% check their smartphone after sex,
  • 23% go on Twitter more than 10 times a day,
  • 51% check social network sites at dinner,
  • 62% use their phones while shopping and
  • 42% will stop a conversation if their phone beeps.

One person was quoted: “Sometimes I wake up in the night and reach for my phone so I can do a Tweet”.

And another: “I take pictures of my food, my feet….pretty much anything and post it online”.

Yes, I think I’m following a few people like that, which reminds me I must do a bit of ‘weeding’ on my Twitter account!

Some other useful (?) statistics that seem to reinforce this sense of  “information pervasiveness”:

  • The average Briton now has 26 Internet accounts for everything from email and bank services to online shopping, social media sites, Skype and Paypal.
  • The average worker checks his email inbox 36 times every hour.
  • 1 in 3 smartphone owners would rather give up sex than their mobile phone (Pew Research)
  • 90% of 18 – 29 year olds say they will sleep wit their phone in or beside their bed (Pew Research)
  • 1 in 10 say they are woken at least a few times per week by calls, texts or emails (Pew Research)

This all seems to reinforce the growing phenomenon of FOMO, pronounced FO-MO, meaning ‘fear of missing out’. These people want or need to be connected to their email and social media channels 24 x 7. And apparently there is another new phobia you can add to the list of human paranoia - Nomophobia. It’s the fear of losing your cell/mobile phone!

But whilst we complain about information overload and having no time to do the quality things in life, we are at the same time adding to the volume. Everyone has a voice and everyone wants to be heard. Which reminds me of the quote by Clay Shirky “publishing isn’t a job any more, it’s a button”.

And if it’s so easy to publish, it’s even easier to share – just one click of a button and it’s shared with all of your Facebook/Twitter/Google+ followers. And your network of friends and followers will in turn share with their networks. Tweets beget more tweets, which might stimulate new comments and new Tweets. And so it goes on. No wonder we’re drowning in information, and social media has made it all so easy. But are we losing something in this morass of news and information, made possible by simple one-click interfaces and frictionless sharing?

I only realised through a conversation with a friend that her relationship with her now ex-boyfriend, was predicated on a whole new protocol of ‘Unfriending’ on Facebook.  You no longer have to have a face-to-face discussion to end a relationship; it can all be done with a click of a button!

Perhaps this one-button-does-everything mentality that we’re now so used to is making us less social and more insensitive to the feelings of others? We have a paradox where social media is reinforcing anti-social behaviour.

It will be interesting to see what 2013 brings in terms of new and shiny social media tools and social networks, but it doesn’t take a philosopher to predict that the cycle of news and information propagation is going to get faster, more people are going to get connected to the Internet, more people will have a voice, and finding that signal amongst all of the noise is going to get that much harder.

Maybe we should think about what we’re losing – the social skills that help us establish trust and understanding with our fellow human beings, and rediscovering those quality conversations. A New Year’s resolution maybe?

Happy Christmas!


Stephen Dale

Managing Director, Collabor8now Ltd

Stephen is an evangelist and practitioner in the use of Social Networking technologies and Social Media applications to support personal learning and knowledge sharing.

See Full Profile >


JC Giraldo
Posted on December 22nd 2012 at 11:34PM

You're absolutely right..

A day in a restaurant I saw a Family : Dad with his BB , Mam with her Iphone and they did not talk..Nothing..the kids playing and only eating pizza..

Every time when I'm on the train or in some restaurant ,or just walk, I  see (myself included) like people do not talk and just take pictures of the food....maybe I can understand when we are alone, but in company, as it is complicated..

I sad....but we live with this uh..

Great Article...Just Share It !

Merry Christmas !


Posted on December 23rd 2012 at 7:11AM

Thanks for the comment JC. I've seen the same sort of thing. It's amazing how many people have their faces in their smartphones as they are walking along, oblivious to everything else around them...people....traffic...! Oh for a stimulating conversation!

JC Giraldo
Posted on December 23rd 2012 at 12:39PM

Hi Stephen Just I made a Infographic with this info ..!

Best from Boston


Mohammed Anzil
Posted on December 23rd 2012 at 6:15AM

Definitely agree with you.........................Excellent article.........

Advance new yeear wishes.........


Posted on December 23rd 2012 at 8:40AM

Many thanks Mohammed - and best wishes for the holiday break.


Mohammed Anzil
Posted on December 23rd 2012 at 9:43AM

Thanks Sir..................................




Kent Ong
Posted on December 27th 2012 at 9:31AM

Is Social Media making us less social? Yes, for offlline social life. There is a book called Alone Together by Sherry Turkle or you can watch her video here -

Posted on December 27th 2012 at 10:01AM

Thanks for the TED video link Kent. I hadn't seen this before I wrote my piece, but clearly there is a common cause here. I'm not sure I like what is happening to us, and we may lose something precious - how to have a quality (f2f) conversations - without realising it was a skill. 

Posted on February 24th 2014 at 3:59PM

On February 23, 2014, 78% of Under-30 PopSavvy players say social media is making us less social.  You ask if we're losing something as we all become 'infomaniacs'.  We are losing our sense of social awareness.  We seem more interested in the incoming text or call than we are in the person right in front of us.  This has a consequence.  We're not learning to 'read the room'.  I believe those who 'stay present' are going to have a personal and professional advantage over those whose minds are always somewhere else.