Twittering houseplants? That's all I need.
You heard me right. Someone has invented a way for your houseplants to send you messages via cyberspace's hottest messaging tool: Twitter.
Seems a little sensor stuck into the plant's soil tells when the plant needs watering and violá! It Tweets you. The kit costs $99. That's a bit more than I'd pay for a novelty that is sure to become somewhat annoying after the novelty wears off.
I already can't follow all my Twitter friends. I need my plants Tweeting me? The good news is that this kit, put out by the company Botanicalls, originally used the phone until someone figured using a free web service made more sense than paying for phone calls. Can you imagine getting a call from your creeping ivy?
Personally I can't imagine either option. I don't want my plants Twittering me when they need watering. And next year I won't want my dog Twittering me when she has to go out for a walk, or wants to eat or wants to play.
I might accept Tweets from my car however, if it could stick to the topic of maintenance and not ask for detailing or to go for a ride. I could see the use in letting me know if the oil is low or old, if tires need air or if a belt is about to break or the battery is ready to die. Now, THAT would be useful.
More than a novelty?
Sure, I can see how this invention can be a conversation starter about technology in our lives and how it can enhance - and detract from - our interactions with each other and the world around us. And I can understand how it could be to communications what Pong was to video games. I get it, believe me. But plants?
Twitter provides a great service - personal and professional - for communicating with each other, keeping us literally up to the minute with current events, etc. Heck if it weren't for @BreakingNewsOn I wouldn't know what was going on out there!
Besides, I know that my fading Christmas Cactus hates me and I don't need that kind of heat.
Here's how I imagine a Twitter conversation between us going:
@neglectful_greenthumb Hey. I know you're busy, but are you coming downstairs anytime soon? I could use some water.
@half_dead_cactus Didn't I just water you the other day?
@neglectful_greenthumb Uh, that was like a month ago.
@half_dead_cactus Yeah, well you ARE a cactus, right? Suck it up for a few more hours.
@neglectful_greenthumb Look, I'm REALLY thirsty. I may not make it another few hours!
@half_dead_cactus Well, last time I watered you, ¾ of your leaves turned black and fell off. I'm a little gun shy with the water.
@neglectful_greenthumb So you're never going to water me again?
@half_dead_cactus My mom said to wait until your soil was completely, completely dry.
@neglectful_greenthumb IT IS COMPLETELY COMPLETELY DRY! I'M HALF DEAD!
@half_dead_cactus You are NOT half dead, and don't get nasty with me or you'll find yourself on the back porch.
@neglectful_greenthumb The back porch?! That's where you put all the plants you've given up on! Don't give up on me! I'll freeze out there!
@half_dead_cactus Calm down! I'm not going to put you on the porch.
(2 minutes goes by with no Tweets)
@neglectful_greenthumb So, are you coming down soon?
@half_dead_cactus I'll be down in 10 minutes. Where's the watering can?
@neglectful_greenthumb Under the sink. Thanks, man.
Since I already know how the conversation would go, I guess I don't need the kit.
Would you Twitter with your plants? How about your dog or cat? Your car?
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