I hate to pick on the United States Postal Service, but they made themselves an easy target earlier this week.
In my mailbox was quite possibly the worst direct mail letter I've received in a long time. I scanned and posted it here (click on the image to see it in all it's glory).
I can count at least nine problems:
1. The envelope was plain white, and addressed to "Postal Customer". No personalization, no stamp, not even a USPS logo in the corner.
2. Even the top of the letter itself was addressed to "POSTAL BUSINESS CUSTOMER", in all caps no less in an apparent attempt to make me feel even more like an anonymous prospect.
3. Although I like the bulleted list of benefits, the subsequent payoff is ambiguous. Provide POSTAL products and services to my customers? Why is POSTAL in all caps again? And do they want me to sell my customers stamps?
4. The next line tells me they'll give me signage, counters, equipment and training. They know I'm a marketing agency, right? Or do they assume that every business that gets mail is a retail location?
5. A lot of actual prospects who receive this might be interested in the "keep a percentage of the sales" part, but it's hidden at the end of the first paragraph. Even if I cared (or were still reading), this benefit gets lost.
6. The first call to action is to attend one of their upcoming seminars. No mention of where, when, link to a calendar of option. Nothing.
7. Oh, wait. I can call the two people listed. No email addresses. No social media options. This doesn't surprise me, but I'm willing to bet Wendy and Liz have email addresses. Why not list them?
8. The letter ends by hoping I become a POSTAL partner. I'm still not entirely sure what that means. I guess I could attend the seminar, but I have no idea when or where that is. And I don't have time to call Wendy or Liz.
9. The letter, of course, is signed by SEATTLE DISTRICT RETAIL. Seriously, it couldn't have at least been Wendy or Liz?
I'm sure I've missed other issues, but there's clearly lessons here for all of us on what NOT to do - in direct mail, email, Web copy and more.