In the buyer-seller situation, the seller must be responsible for shaping mutual behavior.
What's the difference between human nature and human relations?
• Human nature is the instinctive behavior that governs action concerned with the self and with self-interest
• Human relations are concerned with how we think and act in terms of others' interests
Successful selling demands that human relations be dominant over human nature.
Selling is not - and never has been - something a salesperson does to a prospect. Selling is something you do with the prospect, in a process of discovery and interaction - this is human relations at work.
The greatest barrier to success in this process is the "Egocentric Predicament."
This consists of being overly and unnecessarily concerned with self, and actually, our ability to be perceptive and concerned about others is inversely proportionate to our self-concern.
When self gets unnecessarily in the way, the fruitful cycle of good human relations stops producing.
The key to understanding and accepting others is to first understand and accept oneself - starting with the realization that, rather than strive for an unattainable "I should be" image, we should settle for our real self as "I am" - accepting shortcomings along with strengths.
The following points provide some practical answers to the "I am" versus "I should be" conflict.
To begin with, I suggest you recognize it - and recognize that its source is rooted in the views of others.
Either (a) accept your "I am" image or (b) decide on attainable, constructive steps to achieve "I should be" in the future.
Our behavior is a reflection of our attitudes - and our attitudes grow out of our values. Each is an integral part of the other.
And you. Do your life values make it easy for you to put the other person's interests first?
Sincerity is a much-used - maybe over-used - word in relation to selling.
Integrity is a kindred word. Integrity implies a consistent kind of honesty - acting outwardly the way you truly feel inwardly. That's why sound values are so important to your success with others. But integrity is not a single act, but rather a "way of life"
We should always remember, "People buy our product not so much because they understand the product, but because they feel that we understand them." In fact buyers everywhere are crying out "Don't try to sell to me, understand me!"
There are many effective ways of doing this - the best way to create this kind of buying climate is to "transmit on their frequency." This opens their mind to you, makes them willing - and eager - to listen.
As the man said: "Before I sell my prospect what my prospect buys, I must first see my prospect as they see themselves."
News: Here in Paris, we have "enjoyed" the first round of the presidential elections today, and thinking about "Egocentric predicaments" my thoughts immediately turn to Sarkozy's first two years in office - but I think he has learnt his lesson. He remains to fight again on May 6th, and I have to hope that he will prevail - he is not ideal, but he is probably France's only hope of avoiding following Greece and Spain (oh, and Portugal soon) down the EU toilet .