Presidential candidate Hillary Clinton launched her Instagram account this week in a continued campaign to completely dominate the other candidates on social media. Trying to connect with the youngs, Hillary? If my own grandmother knew what a selfie was, I guess I'd be more inclined to vote for her. Let's see how Hillary's doing in terms of Instagram content these last few days. Behold, my review of the first four posts.
Wait. First off, points for the bio: "Doting grandmother, among other things #Hillary2016." Sly, Hillary. Trying hard, but not too hard. But I think it might count as a humblebrag? And you're not just a grandmother. You're one of the most powerful women in the world. Wish you could go ahead and own it (*snaps*). 7.5
Picture Number 1: Pantsuit, Pantsuit Everywhere, But Not A Drop to Drink
The people really loved this one. At this time the photo is climbing to 20,000 likes, not yet Beyonce status (an average of about 1 million likes per photo), but doing okay. The caption ("Hard Choices.") is short, sweet, and continues the self-deprecating tone of the bio. And, in a terrible world where lady politicians are often criticized for their fashion choices, she's really reclaiming the pantsuit, as if to say, "Pantsuited and Proud." But...red, white, and blue? Really? Arranged in the exact order that we actually say those words? Red, white, and blue? That's insane. And girl, I know you wear black sometimes. 8.8
Picture Number 2: Hillary Within Hillary
The caption says "Coming soon: Hillary on the fights that matter." But the photo is kind of stock. Where's the human touch, the specificity? The image is cool, but without context, what am I supposed to think? What are the fights that matter? Whose kitchen is that? If you don't tell me, I'm going to assume it's Diane Sawyer's. Are you friends? That'd be cool. You two have the same haircut. 5.4
Picture Number 3: Countdown to Hillary
Ahhh...Hillary and New York. I remember when Hillary first came to New York as a U.S. Senator. People were like, "Hillary, why are you here in New York? Are you trying to run for President or something? Do you really care about us, we feel so used?" Now, when you pick the number three--the number of days until your official campaign launch in New York--and fit a photo of a metropolis containing a population of 8 million into that cutout, well, us New Yorkers feel like that very batter you're using to make your Presidential cookies. If you really loved New York, you'd photoshop a picture of yourself paddling in one of the rental boats in Central Park, show yourself eating a New York hot dog -- something, anything authentic! Is this why NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio isn't coming to the rally? 6.0
Picture Number 4: Baby Biker Hillary
OMG Hillary is that you? How awesome. A baby photo! So #tbt! Warm, heartfelt, personal. Next week, give me some pics of you and Bill in the '70s, and we're good. 9.0.