While meandering through the traffic on Marine Drive one fine day, my vision was deterred by the glisten coming from the side .I veered my eyes towards the direction of the light and saw a rainbow coloured waterbody necklacing the road.To the sheer pleasure of my senses,I could see the water draped in different hues -the austere white,the crimson red, the royal blue and the enviable green.....giving the shores the semblance of a spectrum that radiated light all over.
I stood there, fixated and awed by the sheer beauty of the sight.It seemed to present a reverse imagery of sorts ,for a web of words started spinning around my mind and I flopped like a fish ,hunting for the apt lines that could describe the sceinic splendor.While I was in the midst of my hunt ....I wondered whether it was for real. For such a picturesque sight was a rarity in Mumbai.Yes, I thought. It was such a misfit, a rare avis,a startler...................blah blah blah I kept wondering .
But soon I was woken up from my tranced self and transported to the spectre of reality.For as I raced my eyelids to see what had caused such a spectacle, I encountered the rude shock that the light dance was not any craft of nature, but the doing of the very earthly , very corporeal structures, that stood audaciously planted at the sea shore-Yes! The light was coming from the various HOARDINGS , perched insolently at the sea side. My expression plummeted ,from that of Awe to one of a tired Phew!!.It took some time for the reality to seep in my brain, but it made me mad with anger.I had never liked the idea of overwhelming the passersby with Hoardings all around the road .They seemed to blind you with their offerings. And now they had taken to the seas also? How can anybody plant hoardings at the sea shore and completely rob it off its beauty? Weren't the roads enough to stage this Mad Adism? Will the seas too be invaded by human greed and made Sites for sale ?? How can something so austere be invaded by such lowly structures? Certainly not!! ,certain things deserve to remain Virgin. We cannot go on raping nature in our greed to rein supreme.
Steeped in fury, I marched towards these ugly looking creatures.But as if sensing my motive, to my surprise ,the hoardings engaged in a tete a tete with me. 'Hello!' said the first hoarding in a welcoming tone. 'I am Feartel mobile and I believe that barriers break when people talk.So whatever it is that is irking you, share with us !! 'Oooh!!' I was left agape at the articulation of the 'structure of steel.' And while I was still coming to terms with whatever that was happening, my baffled state was disturbed by a rather stern voice.'Let me take pride in introducing myself as the most successful car on the Indian roads' bragged the second hoarding ,placed nearby.' I am Varuti' ,it continued, and I can sure take you for a ride'. 'Oh! I am impressed' mocked I in my thoughts.But this entire episode, this overfriendliness of one and the kiddish display of might of another ,provoked me to action. I had had enough from them . After all, it's the great Homosapeins that have the gift of gab and not these metallic bimbos that now seemed to daunt me with the magnanimity of their size and the verbosity of their tongue.So my ikkie (read as my self esteem) pushed itself hard to come out with a retort, And pat came one. 'And I am Nisha, but I don't need to announce that to the world by defacing nature's artistry and forcing my being on it'. Clap! Clap! Clap! Applauded my ikkie in praise of my wit.My face lighted with pleasure only to be dimmed by what I heard next. 'Well Madame ,why at all would you want to announce that to the world? For you are not Up for Sale! but 'We are' sang the metal bimbos ( read as Hoardings) in chorus. 'What?' I shouted. The remark completely took me aback. I soothed my fury and reflected in abstraction on hearing this.My eyes averted, my mind pondering on the profoundness of what was just said .
I took my thoughts off from the war of words and flickered my eyes around the vast townscape. I could see a promiscuous display of many more such bimbos who now seemed to be all over the place, looking at me with inviting eyes. Some trying to flirt, in the hope of cracking an affair and forcing a deal from me. Some flaunting their torsi, rest others dodging my sight with their neon signs. 'Come! Embrace our offerings' they seemed to shout in a hysterical cacophony. 'Or atleast pass a glance,You might just fall prey. Or atleast it will assure us your top of the mind recall' they seemed to giggle amongst themselves.
Just then,from a distance could be heard a tone that sure would have raised the hackles of an unsuspecting passerby. 'Achtung! Achtung!' screamed the 'Horsche' from a distance. 'Calling the attention of the mighty few who can afford to drive me home!Due to the expected splurge in demand(one could see the overflow of conceit its voice),I am now running limited stocks.So hurry you all ,lest remorse sets on you'.
I could no longer make sense of anything that was happening around me. It was as if these bimbos had found in me a spectator who had the time to stare long enough at them.And now all seemed to close in on me with their propaganda. I felt choked to the brim of my mouth. Why did they have to be so Omnipresent?.Why are they plaguing me with their presence ?I could no longer be here.Hoping to get away from the mayhem,I paced my car faster ,but was soon stopped in the tracks by a bold display of human anatomy. 'Global Warming' the hoarding read silhouetted by a barely clad model. 'Huh!' said I ,despising the mass of flesh.The model's pout, oomphs and oodles seemed to break err.. melt the ice in this case and strike a conversation with me.But thankfully I was straight enough in my orientations as well as direction so as not to go Astray.I headed away thumbing down at the failed attempt of the seductress.
But today I seemed to have run out of luck ,for as i inched further..Oh Gawd! another bimbo!! Lay ahead. I have been seeing this bimbo ever sinceI was born and I would introduce it as 'The self proclaimed master of 'word play'. 'Hi dudette!' The bimbo welcomed me. 'Enjoying the utterly butterly delicious night?' it continued.
'Ohhh not again' I murmured.I had never liked the ad's frivolous attempts at humor and this time my patience knew no bounds.I wanted to vent out the years of detestation I had experienced on seeing its caricatures.So, missing no chance,I screamed with my neck perched out of the car window 'Hey kiddo! Listen up! Are you at all aware of the reason of your being?? You are supposed to sell butter and not try your hand at the silly malapropisms.Do you understand that?' But the undeterred CHILD PRODIGY was ready with a reply' Well my word plays are just an attempt to bring smiles on the otherwise humor deprived mortals of this planet.'
'Oh and you think you are pretty good at it? Well if that is your intention, then I must say that you are just bereft of good ideas. So grow up and stop making a fool of yourself'
'Well Miss, I am not here to justify the humor in my ads, and I think you are too obtuse to understand the wit in it.Anyways I would not want to indulge in anymore arguments or intellectual gossips with you.So Good bye and enjoy a Butter smooth ride'
'Arrrrghh!! ' said I and sped away.
I could feel a pressure building up in my mind. These larger than life structures were on a rampage today. They had found in me a spectator or I think a rebel perhaps, and now wanted to assault my senses by hawking every nook and corner of the city, trying desperately to win over my attention and rope me into buying their propositions. I tried hard to race past them but as if the cosmos had conspired against me, the traffic lights turned to red. My car came to a screeching halt,drawing eye balls from all and sundry ,who too were fixated in their tracks, waiting for destiny to change its hue and give them a 'Go Ahead' signal .I gaped outside to see the length of the queue and guess what.I could see a smirk coming from ..well..Gulp!..another hoarding.However much I tried to ignore it I could not resist catching a glimpse of it from the corner of my eye.And this bimbo,I must admit was a real street smart one .For it was so cleverly perched near the traffic signal,that every head behind the wheel, would have no choice but to stare at it as an alternative to simply waiting for the traffic to clear.
'Join these three dots'-It asked in a tone that couldn't have been more patronizing. My imbecility fell for the bait and to my surprise I attempted the no brainer. After I was done joining the silly dots, I could read the ad's proposition . 'Now getting an insurance could be as simple.Just follow three simple steps to............. Blah blah blah! the ad went on . 'Oops' I felt embarrassed and abashed at the very thought that a steel façade had yet again won over my attention.I wanted to get away from all this that was becoming too much. Fortunately, the signal turned green and I flew the four wheeler faster than the pace of my thoughts. 'My next stop would be my home' swore I .I will not let anything take precedence over my resolve to reach my Home Sweet Home , not even those silly bimbos!! But I could see a discomfort, welling up inside me.The sense of defeat had worn me down.I needed a break,needed to rest this turbulence that I had been riding for quite some time now .
I felt parched and more so as i looked up at the daunting 'Bums Up Cola' hoarding that stood near my car.It seemed to bear the promise of quenching my exasperation.I was too weary to analyse the repercussions of my actions.So looking no further,I slammed the brakes and made a mad dash at a Kirana store nearby.I grabbed and gulped down a 'Bums Up' bottle down my throat and looked up realizing what had just happened. The model in the 'Bums Up' Ad seemed to smile and then laugh out loud. And it had all reasons for the guffaw.I had kow towed to the bimbos charm YET AGAIN!!!!! 'Stop that sneer!!' I shrieked out loud but my voice tailed off in the clamour behind me ,that was now rising in decibles. I turned around to see the source of the deafening noise and witnessed a spectacle. All the hoardings were clapping in unison ,celebrating the roping in of yet another Customer. Hi Fis were being slammed , whistles blowed and Victory hymns being sung. The Bums Up hoarding was the star of the day.
I could not witness this gaiety any more.I looked into abstraction ,my eyes averted, my mind pondering. I felt dwarfed , goofy and conquered .I reached for my car, and snailed it off wondering in dismay whether who actually was Up for sale!!
I stood there, fixated and awed by the sheer beauty of the sight.It seemed to present a reverse imagery of sorts ,for a web of words started spinning around my mind and I flopped like a fish ,hunting for the apt lines that could describe the sceinic splendor.While I was in the midst of my hunt ....I wondered whether it was for real. For such a picturesque sight was a rarity in Mumbai.Yes, I thought. It was such a misfit, a rare avis,a startler...................blah blah blah I kept wondering .
But soon I was woken up from my tranced self and transported to the spectre of reality.For as I raced my eyelids to see what had caused such a spectacle, I encountered the rude shock that the light dance was not any craft of nature, but the doing of the very earthly , very corporeal structures, that stood audaciously planted at the sea shore-Yes! The light was coming from the various HOARDINGS , perched insolently at the sea side. My expression plummeted ,from that of Awe to one of a tired Phew!!.It took some time for the reality to seep in my brain, but it made me mad with anger.I had never liked the idea of overwhelming the passersby with Hoardings all around the road .They seemed to blind you with their offerings. And now they had taken to the seas also? How can anybody plant hoardings at the sea shore and completely rob it off its beauty? Weren't the roads enough to stage this Mad Adism? Will the seas too be invaded by human greed and made Sites for sale ?? How can something so austere be invaded by such lowly structures? Certainly not!! ,certain things deserve to remain Virgin. We cannot go on raping nature in our greed to rein supreme.
Steeped in fury, I marched towards these ugly looking creatures.But as if sensing my motive, to my surprise ,the hoardings engaged in a tete a tete with me. 'Hello!' said the first hoarding in a welcoming tone. 'I am Feartel mobile and I believe that barriers break when people talk.So whatever it is that is irking you, share with us !! 'Oooh!!' I was left agape at the articulation of the 'structure of steel.' And while I was still coming to terms with whatever that was happening, my baffled state was disturbed by a rather stern voice.'Let me take pride in introducing myself as the most successful car on the Indian roads' bragged the second hoarding ,placed nearby.' I am Varuti' ,it continued, and I can sure take you for a ride'. 'Oh! I am impressed' mocked I in my thoughts.But this entire episode, this overfriendliness of one and the kiddish display of might of another ,provoked me to action. I had had enough from them . After all, it's the great Homosapeins that have the gift of gab and not these metallic bimbos that now seemed to daunt me with the magnanimity of their size and the verbosity of their tongue.So my ikkie (read as my self esteem) pushed itself hard to come out with a retort, And pat came one. 'And I am Nisha, but I don't need to announce that to the world by defacing nature's artistry and forcing my being on it'. Clap! Clap! Clap! Applauded my ikkie in praise of my wit.My face lighted with pleasure only to be dimmed by what I heard next. 'Well Madame ,why at all would you want to announce that to the world? For you are not Up for Sale! but 'We are' sang the metal bimbos ( read as Hoardings) in chorus. 'What?' I shouted. The remark completely took me aback. I soothed my fury and reflected in abstraction on hearing this.My eyes averted, my mind pondering on the profoundness of what was just said .
I took my thoughts off from the war of words and flickered my eyes around the vast townscape. I could see a promiscuous display of many more such bimbos who now seemed to be all over the place, looking at me with inviting eyes. Some trying to flirt, in the hope of cracking an affair and forcing a deal from me. Some flaunting their torsi, rest others dodging my sight with their neon signs. 'Come! Embrace our offerings' they seemed to shout in a hysterical cacophony. 'Or atleast pass a glance,You might just fall prey. Or atleast it will assure us your top of the mind recall' they seemed to giggle amongst themselves.
Just then,from a distance could be heard a tone that sure would have raised the hackles of an unsuspecting passerby. 'Achtung! Achtung!' screamed the 'Horsche' from a distance. 'Calling the attention of the mighty few who can afford to drive me home!Due to the expected splurge in demand(one could see the overflow of conceit its voice),I am now running limited stocks.So hurry you all ,lest remorse sets on you'.
I could no longer make sense of anything that was happening around me. It was as if these bimbos had found in me a spectator who had the time to stare long enough at them.And now all seemed to close in on me with their propaganda. I felt choked to the brim of my mouth. Why did they have to be so Omnipresent?.Why are they plaguing me with their presence ?I could no longer be here.Hoping to get away from the mayhem,I paced my car faster ,but was soon stopped in the tracks by a bold display of human anatomy. 'Global Warming' the hoarding read silhouetted by a barely clad model. 'Huh!' said I ,despising the mass of flesh.The model's pout, oomphs and oodles seemed to break err.. melt the ice in this case and strike a conversation with me.But thankfully I was straight enough in my orientations as well as direction so as not to go Astray.I headed away thumbing down at the failed attempt of the seductress.
But today I seemed to have run out of luck ,for as i inched further..Oh Gawd! another bimbo!! Lay ahead. I have been seeing this bimbo ever sinceI was born and I would introduce it as 'The self proclaimed master of 'word play'. 'Hi dudette!' The bimbo welcomed me. 'Enjoying the utterly butterly delicious night?' it continued.
'Ohhh not again' I murmured.I had never liked the ad's frivolous attempts at humor and this time my patience knew no bounds.I wanted to vent out the years of detestation I had experienced on seeing its caricatures.So, missing no chance,I screamed with my neck perched out of the car window 'Hey kiddo! Listen up! Are you at all aware of the reason of your being?? You are supposed to sell butter and not try your hand at the silly malapropisms.Do you understand that?' But the undeterred CHILD PRODIGY was ready with a reply' Well my word plays are just an attempt to bring smiles on the otherwise humor deprived mortals of this planet.'
'Oh and you think you are pretty good at it? Well if that is your intention, then I must say that you are just bereft of good ideas. So grow up and stop making a fool of yourself'
'Well Miss, I am not here to justify the humor in my ads, and I think you are too obtuse to understand the wit in it.Anyways I would not want to indulge in anymore arguments or intellectual gossips with you.So Good bye and enjoy a Butter smooth ride'
'Arrrrghh!! ' said I and sped away.
I could feel a pressure building up in my mind. These larger than life structures were on a rampage today. They had found in me a spectator or I think a rebel perhaps, and now wanted to assault my senses by hawking every nook and corner of the city, trying desperately to win over my attention and rope me into buying their propositions. I tried hard to race past them but as if the cosmos had conspired against me, the traffic lights turned to red. My car came to a screeching halt,drawing eye balls from all and sundry ,who too were fixated in their tracks, waiting for destiny to change its hue and give them a 'Go Ahead' signal .I gaped outside to see the length of the queue and guess what.I could see a smirk coming from ..well..Gulp!..another hoarding.However much I tried to ignore it I could not resist catching a glimpse of it from the corner of my eye.And this bimbo,I must admit was a real street smart one .For it was so cleverly perched near the traffic signal,that every head behind the wheel, would have no choice but to stare at it as an alternative to simply waiting for the traffic to clear.
'Join these three dots'-It asked in a tone that couldn't have been more patronizing. My imbecility fell for the bait and to my surprise I attempted the no brainer. After I was done joining the silly dots, I could read the ad's proposition . 'Now getting an insurance could be as simple.Just follow three simple steps to............. Blah blah blah! the ad went on . 'Oops' I felt embarrassed and abashed at the very thought that a steel façade had yet again won over my attention.I wanted to get away from all this that was becoming too much. Fortunately, the signal turned green and I flew the four wheeler faster than the pace of my thoughts. 'My next stop would be my home' swore I .I will not let anything take precedence over my resolve to reach my Home Sweet Home , not even those silly bimbos!! But I could see a discomfort, welling up inside me.The sense of defeat had worn me down.I needed a break,needed to rest this turbulence that I had been riding for quite some time now .
I felt parched and more so as i looked up at the daunting 'Bums Up Cola' hoarding that stood near my car.It seemed to bear the promise of quenching my exasperation.I was too weary to analyse the repercussions of my actions.So looking no further,I slammed the brakes and made a mad dash at a Kirana store nearby.I grabbed and gulped down a 'Bums Up' bottle down my throat and looked up realizing what had just happened. The model in the 'Bums Up' Ad seemed to smile and then laugh out loud. And it had all reasons for the guffaw.I had kow towed to the bimbos charm YET AGAIN!!!!! 'Stop that sneer!!' I shrieked out loud but my voice tailed off in the clamour behind me ,that was now rising in decibles. I turned around to see the source of the deafening noise and witnessed a spectacle. All the hoardings were clapping in unison ,celebrating the roping in of yet another Customer. Hi Fis were being slammed , whistles blowed and Victory hymns being sung. The Bums Up hoarding was the star of the day.
I could not witness this gaiety any more.I looked into abstraction ,my eyes averted, my mind pondering. I felt dwarfed , goofy and conquered .I reached for my car, and snailed it off wondering in dismay whether who actually was Up for sale!!
